isn’t about blame or shame, it’s about a real personal struggle that the user has with the substance that he or she is addicted to. The addiction isn’t about you, it’s not about hurting you or shaming you . No matter how much you love an addict, you will not stop their addiction—only the addict can do that. Your love and support can help them to make the decision to get well, but in the end, the addiction is part of your loved one and it will be up to that individual to fix the problem. A survey conducted in the United Kingdom found that romantic partners’ happiness changed as the rate of drug abuse changed. People whose partners occasionally used drugs reported their happiness between seven and eight out of 10 on a happiness scale. However, women who were in relationships with a person who continually abused drugs reported that their happiness had fallen to three out of 10.

I’ve admitted to her I have problem and I’ve checked myself into in house rehab program for 28 days next week, I’ve gone to a GA meeting every day in the mean time. The addict might deserve a lot of the blame, but blame will keep you angry, hurt and powerless. It’s the fuel that started it and it’s the fuel that will keep it going. Be careful you’re not contributing to keeping the shame fire lit.

What are the signs?

Avoid foods and drinks that are high in sugar, caffeine, and carbohydrates, as these will trigger unwanted changes to blood sugar, energy levels, and mood. Women who are addicted to relationships may have low self-esteem and require an outside source to feel better. Some don’t know how to “be themselves” and may use compulsive behavior like indiscriminate sexual activity to feel better. The causes of love addiction are rooted in childhood trauma. Individuals lacking self-esteem or who had less-than-nurturing childhoods may grow up looking for constant reassurance from others.


You must identify the ways that you may have been enabling their addiction in the past, and create boundaries to prevent these behaviors in the future. For those closest to an addict, it can be difficult to identify the ways they are enabling their loved one’s addiction because it can take on many forms. You may be concerned that a person struggling with addiction does not love you anymore and will always prefer to use drugs. While they may be unable to control their behavior without help from addiction treatment specialists, the person still loves you. One of the biggest problems in relationships in which someone is struggling with addiction is deceit. Someone who is addicted to drugs or alcohol often lies about how much of a substance they have consumed.

Other Addiction Resources

While this is not a perfect analogy, the idea is that trying to save an addict who doesn’t want to help themselves is more likely to ruin you than save them. Reach out to other members of the family members and friends. It’s essential to seek professional help who can provide guidance and support to maintain the conversation positive. We recommend you read our guide to stage an intervention to help you get started.

How do you deal with a dating addict?

  1. Turn off dating app notifications.
  2. Remove dating apps from your home screen.
  3. Keep your phone away from you when doing other tasks.
  4. Pursue a new hobby.
  5. Connect with old friends and family.

No extreme pattern of reward-seeking, whether it is for food, sex, romantic love, or drugs, is likely to promote a person’s chances of flourishing in the modern world—and any normal capacity can be taken to extremes . How else might “being in love” be taken to differ from being addicted to certain drugs?

Want to learn more? Explore our resources

Sadly, living with an loving an addict will mean that your need for love and attention will be neglected. Being in a relationship with an addict can be difficult. It can cause serious problems for your children, your finances, and every other aspect of your life.

Between Addiction and Prison, I Left My Boy to Grow Up Without a Dad – The Marshall Project

Between Addiction and Prison, I Left My Boy to Grow Up Without a Dad.

Posted: Fri, 18 Nov 2022 08:00:00 GMT [source]